I've only been off work two weeks and I'm already starting to lose the plot.
It's ridiculous, really. You spend your life wishing that you didn't have to drag your carcass into the office but when you don't have that enforced structure to your week, it's amazing how quickly the days start to blur.
I know these two weeks are important; to get essential tests done and let the news sink in but I really need to get into some sort of routine.
But at the moment I just can't plan. For anything. Every invitation I accept is on the proviso that I may have a medical appointment that I just don't know about yet. I'm living my life in limbo ...
And can I say that there have been a lot of invitations. Which is lovely and has really helped to distract me from the interminable waiting. But it also makes me feel a bit guilty. Because, well ... I don't look or feel ill! I know that will change when treatment starts but, apart from the fact I have a tumour, I'm actually very fit and well. If a bit bored.
So I will go out to lunch today and enjoy it. And I will take advantage of the free ticket to see the Wizard of Oz tonight, and enjoy it ... because who knows what tomorrow might bring.
Well, in fairness, I do. I'm supposed to be getting the first part of my treatment plan so hopefully - finally - I'll find out when my operation will be. So, for the sake of my sanity, I'm keeping everything crossed!